As parents, we need our children to be:

• Happy

• Healthy

• Safe

Over the last few years, the terms ‘safeguarding’ and 'welfare' have increasingly appeared in many areas of sport. Many of us will have heard of cases in the media, but unfortunately, these scenarios are not limited to high-profile cases and are happening at the grassroots level across the country.

Shockingly, this mistreatment can happen right in front of our own eyes without us even realising it because so few of us actually know where the line is between acceptable and unacceptable behaviours of those in positions of responsibility and trust. This has to change.

We at The Athlete Place feel that this is a critical issue to discuss on our platform… partly because we have had our own personal experience of it and were blind to the warning signs until it was too late. We want to help others avoid this pain and heartache.

We have no intention of going into explicit detail about our and others’ associated experiences. No athlete was physically hurt or subjected to the physical side of sexual abuse… but what we will say is that the psychological fallout was, and still is, significant.

The Importance of Trust

When we take our kids to a sports club for the first time, we do so with complete trust in the setup and that our child’s health, wellbeing, and safety will be of paramount consideration to those to whom we have entrusted them. It is essential we can fully trust all environments where children participate in organised sports activities. 

Importantly, athletes also need to feel that the adults in positions of responsibility within the sporting environment are on their side, want what’s best for them, and will never cause them harm. If this trust is broken, especially early on in life, it can profoundly impact a person’s ability to ‘feel safe’ with others going forward, impacting friendships and relationships and potentially causing mental health issues further down the line. No athlete should experience this.

Sadly, most safeguarding and welfare issues within sport stem from the inappropriate behaviour of coaches. However, it’s important to say here that the majority of coaches are genuine, trustworthy people who are 100% dedicated to helping young athletes achieve their goals safely and enjoyably… and we are truly indebted to all of them for all that they do. Without them, youth and junior sports would not exist.

It’s the small minority that safeguarding and welfare issues apply to…

Where the line becomes blurred …

A coach’s job is to organise and supervise training sessions and to act in a way that builds athletes’ confidence as well as skill sets. Saying the right things and using appropriate body language is an integral part of the role. Kids should come away feeling happy, fired-up, confident, and optimistic about their experience and/ or sporting prospects.

Unsurprisingly, coaches become trusted, respected adults and sometimes even friends, whose words are often viewed ‘as gospel’ in the eyes of both athletes AND parents. We tend not to question what they say and do. We shouldn’t need to. They are the experts.

… and crossed

When you’re convinced that the coach has your athlete’s best interest at heart and is bringing out the best in them, especially from a performance point of view, ‘red flags’ can be easily overlooked, and the benefit of the doubt given if concerns do appear… this is a very easy trap to fall into.

Looking back at our own experience, the 'red flags' had been waving for a long time, but we downplayed them because we trusted him. I personally, also felt guilty raising my concerns because this man was devoting considerable time and effort (for free) to my son's sport. Questioning his behaviour would have been awkward, to say the least, and come across as ungrateful. It was a genuine fear that this might impact the coach-athlete relationship. It felt like a no-win situation for me.

It’s all very well saying that as a parent, you shouldn’t feel guilty for missing warning signs… you should have been able to trust the coach after all but believe me; you do feel guilty. It’s a horrible feeling.

Risk Factors Affecting Higher-Performers

Specific issues can begin to occur when a young athlete shows sporting potential. Coaches can become more intense, with the athlete receiving more of their attention. Time can also be spent in a one-to-one environment (even within a training set-up). When athletes get to a level that involves more extensive travelling for competitions, especially those that involve overnight stays, issues can arise if parents cannot accompany their athletes. Even at an elite level, training camps, which are often overseas, present their own set of safeguarding and welfare complications. Just because they’re in their late teens/twenties, they’re still your child and are still vulnerable…

Protocol for Reporting:

We feel strongly that anyone experiencing, observing, hearing of, or suspecting behaviours should always have the ability to report concerns.

The ability to report issues anonymously would greatly help, as would the ability to obtain anonymous advice. This has already been provided in the area of anti-doping. Here at The Athlete Place, we will be pushing for these changes.

Take Home Points

• As parents, our three main goals are to ensure our children are happy, healthy and safe.
  
  
• Many parents (and athletes) are unaware of where the line is between acceptable and unacceptable behaviours.
  
  
• Always raise concerns about any behaviours of others that cause your athlete unhappiness and/or anxiety.
  
  
• When the safeguarding line is crossed, the loss of trust can be very hard to get over.

Note: We have used the word ‘coach’ as a relatable example to represent anyone who performs/attempts abusive behaviours within a sporting context.

Both you and your athlete must understand that most coaches and support staff are genuine, lovely people who often give their time and expertise free of charge… and only want the very best for your young athlete.

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